AT LEAST HE'S NOT A NEGRO

Last night's episode of Downton was such a mish-mash of BORING that I hardly know where to start. I have A LOT to say, so I am going to break it up into easier-to-digest bits...

The "wedding" of Rose and Atticus is upon us. It's set in the London REGISTRY OFFICE, and looks like the non-event of the season, I guess owing to the fact that the young lovers are of different faiths. Or maybe Rose is pregnant? Why else the rush and lack of pomp? 

Rose's mother Susan, and Atticus's father Lord Sinderby (sometimes I think he looks like Alexander Putin, other times like Yul Brynner) are each opposed to the union, for sorta the same reason--because she's NOT Jewish/because he IS Jewish. At least he's not a NEGRO, Lady Flintshire! (Remember THAT guy?) 

Oh, and in typical hackneyed predictable Downton fashion, Atticus's father calls Rose a SHIKSA! But not, at least thank God, to her face. No, in this episode the "boorish manners" incident (it's officially a requisite in period dramas) is left to Rose's mummy. First, she hires a floozy to frame Atticus, then, in desperation, announces to the world that she and Stumpy (Squinty?) are getting a divorce. It's so easy to thwart one's child's happiness when one's child's future father-in-law has previously announced to the world his disdain for divorce and divorced people! 

So, as the organ starts playing the "Bridal Chorus" from Lohengrin (wait, did that happen?) Susan just sits down next to Aunt Vi and says "what? Am I supposed to just lose gracefully?" And the Dowager, known, of course for her caustic tongue, her very BON bon mots, says "yes." Ooo, SNAP!

Then there's more slightly-offensive-to-Jewish people stuff said by a Lady Somebody-or-Other who looks like John Lithgow in drag and who forgets that Cora's father was Jewish. Oops. 

Okay. So that raises a few things that have been bothering me. Poor Phoebe Nicolls, the VERY talented actress that plays Rose's mother, deserves better than this tripe they've given her. In case some of you missed it, Nicholls played Sebastian's sister Cordelia in "Brideshead" back in the early 80s But her Downton character has no dimension--she's simply a TYPE, LIKE SO MANY OF THE PERIPHERAL CHARACTERS ON DOWNTON. That is one of the major problems with the writing--a lack of any real character development. With but a few exceptions, everyone on the show has just...stopped...growing...doing...BECOMING anything. (Yes, Mary, we know--you hate Edith.) And the other characters around them are just TYPES, put there to create situations for the "main" characters; to GIVE them something to react against. Am I making sense?

I mean, Rose's mother Susan would be far more interesting if we KNEW WHY she was the way she is. What's her story? WHAT HAPPENED? Nope; she's just Rose's sorta crazy obnoxious mother. Her very FIRST (and I guess we're supposed to assume LAST) words to her future son-in-law are "what a peculiar name."

Then...the Dowager. Are we supposed to believe that she's getting all soft now over the reappearance of Prince Cadaver? She seems to be losing her touch. She actually said at the beginning of last night's episode (during Rose's little trousseau fashion show) "Love may not conquer all, but it can conquer quite a lot." WOW! I guess the writers could have had her say "Money can't buy happiness; but it CAN buy some other things that aren't happiness!" 

DRIVEL.

Then, Robert and Cora, Isobel, Squinty and Putin/Brynner are all standing and chatting, and the subject turns to India, because Squinty has just finished being something important over there. And Isobel says--INEXPLICABLY--that they DID get word of that Amritsar Affair! WHAT??? The Amritsar incident happened in...1919! At least five years ago! WHAT was the purpose of introducing THAT little nugget? OH, I forgot--these people are such an integral part of the Fabric of British History that NO historical event does not touch them in some way, however slight and obscure. The Titanic, the Teapot Dome Scandal, "HER" Hitler's Beer Hall Putsch, and now the Amritsar Affair. I'll bet the only one you don't have to look up is the Titanic (MAYbe the Hitler thing). Yes, these people ARE Britannia! 

PEDICTABLE HACKNEYED AND BORING

Oh, and then Gillingham and Mabel show up at Rose's reception. WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING THERE? Just letting us know that they will be all right in the end. And providing Mary an opportunity for closure, I guess. "You were what I needed when I needed it." SHE USED HIM FOR SEX. He's lucky he got out of it alive.

BORING AND FAKE